joyofanonymity

:(

Wed, 27 Feb 2008 19:17:07 GMT

Oh my god

I have just thoroughly depressed myself by looking through archives in LJ where people actually have friends, and social lives and good stuff like that...

*sigh*

Weird dream...

Wed, 27 Feb 2008 17:37:52 GMT

I had a really strange dream last night...one that was so nice that i felt horrible when I woke up to reality this morning. And the only thing I can really remember about it this morning is that I was with a man who was treating me so well that it just had to be a dream. The good thing is that the man wasn't anyone I know in real life, or that would have been too weird...my subconscious is over-active at the best of times without throwing that into the mix aswell.

I really wish I hadn't had to wake up this morning...bring back lovely man.

On a totally different level, it doesn't take Freud to tell me what my subconscious was trying to say to me...which is making the whole thing worse because I know what needs to be done, I'm just not in the place to do it right now...

Rather unimpressed by it all and getting more fed up by the second. Working this late isn't helping at all as I'm missing decent human contact - "lonely, oh so lonely"...

You wouldn't think that I used to be quite intellectual, if a bit scatty at times. My intellectual conversation meter is dropping by the nano-second and only gets a very rare (but very appreciated) top-up...

I need to stop moaning...moan meter is far too high...self pity meter the same...

Cheer up for goodness' sake

Tue, 26 Feb 2008 17:47:23 GMT

So I have decided that by hook or by crook, I MUST try to cheer myself up. I got home last night and spent mush of my time trying not to cry, unable to eat and had a bad night's sleep...again...

And the worst thing is I know, partly, what's wrong with me and I can't do a thing about it...yet...

Find that I'm working my butt off to make up for it in some way, although it doesn't...sigh

Must try harder

And must try to avoid the whole alcohol/drugs route...it does not help...lol

Ah well...

Been a while

Mon, 25 Feb 2008 18:36:20 GMT

So it has been a while, mainly since posting via a mobile is not a very good idea...can now post from work which is pretty good :)

Things aren't getting better as quick as I would like...need accommodation sharpish...boo to the lack of flatness...

I'm not even sure why i'm posting on here either as I have no friends on here...lol...but im sure that posting gets it all off my chest one way or another...:)

Anyway, I should go get some work done...lol...

Needing proper human interaction soon...

xxx

Sniff...

Sat, 13 Oct 2007 03:18:38 GMT

I'm having one of those years where i'm so unsure of everything and pretty much drowning. I hope 2007 (the end of) rectifies everything and that 2008 can be a hell of a lot better, because to be frank, this year has truly sucked.
So now I find myself awake at this time in the morning when i'm working tomorrow and spending my life thinking 'if only' and 'what if'...And also wishing my life away which is no way for a twenty something to live...

Give me a rock please...

Thu, 11 Oct 2007 10:17:01 GMT

I would really like to hide under one for an unspecified amount of time *sigh*
This sucks...

grr

Wed, 10 Oct 2007 20:07:31 GMT

Ok - so attempting to set up an email account on a mobile phone is proving impossible - i'm surprised that I managed to set this up. I'll need to find a cyber cafe or something.
feeling sad that i'm stuck in the house - there are a million other places to be. Anyway, at least I've got this thing up and running. One step at a time...lol.